It's very interesting how the Neuropsychology and particularly Phd. Rick Hanson explain a method to turning passing experiences into lasting structures inside the brain, in hardwiring happiness.
Especially in today's world with all the stress that can overwhelm our lives; being frustrated, lack of confidence, depressed, with bad feelings, and other word unhappy. So, this method show us how passing mental states become lasting neural traits. We have to overcome the brain's hardwire negative bias that create weakness, and install in the brain all the positive experiences of kindness, compassion, confidence, etc., so we can heal ourselves by:
HEAL. Have a positive experience. Enrich it. Absorb it, and an optional step, Link a positive and negative material. The result, you have it and enjoy it. You've got the happiness!
What I really remark more, is the thought at the end of his presentation with the question: "What is the most important minute in your life?" and his answer " It's the next one". And I think answering that question is a very good point of start to pursue a real happiness.
In contrast, or as a complement to that video are others powerful methods to happiness. The power of gratitude for example, when Bruce Epperly says "Gratitude reminds us of the chain of causes that makes everyday life possible...In the naming our blessings, we discover a new God's providence and creative activity in our lives, congregations, and the world".
Also, in the other article by Harville Hendrix, Stay in the Canoe & and Keep Paddling, he points the importance of empathy. This concept I think goes beyond the relationship between couples, it's more than that, a must to apply in our life to others. He says "Empathy is the most powerful bonding experience you can have...If you stay in the process, you will get to empathy, and then your problems will dissolve and the issues will disappear...The process is the solution to everything in a relationship...With repeated use over time, your relationship will change from dangerous to safe, and then you will have the relationship of your dreams". That is not happiness?